Alright, who put REM on repeat? 'Cause that's all I'm hearin' right now.

[He's not doing a very good job of hiding the fact that he's worried. Nope]

Guys, has...has anyone seen Starr around? I...can't find her. Anywhere.

[He sounds a bit distracted - this is probably more of a note to self than anything. Unfortunately for J, it's still public]

...huh. Think I'm outta hair gel.

[Screened to all EBA/EBD]

First off...well, looks like whoever's pullin' us here wanted the full set. You're all stayin' safe, I hope.

Look, I've been thinkin' - 'bout that video of the river a while back. Might just be bouncin' off the wall again with this one, but hear me out.

Going theory's that this ain't really Manhattan. After seein' that video, I'm thinkin' we might be closed off from everything - just a city and nothin' else. Pretty big city, sure, but there still ain't many people here, an' if Music's made by people...

I'm startin' to wonder if maybe we can't hear much Music because there ain't much Music to hear in the first place.

...dunno. Like I said; just been thinkin'.

[/Screened]

I'm thinkin' I might've missed somethin', and somethin' big at that.

What's this about Piano Man goin' missing?

[He tried to screen this from the EBA/EBD, but failed, so this is open for all to see. At the moment, his voice is tight, as though something's hurting]

Didn't really go like I thought it would...

Look, I- I'm comin' clean here. Few days ago, when I called for help, I...got bitten. By one of the big nasty ones, too. Thought I'd keep it low, so everybody else don't have to know - keep a few people from worryin...it ain't workin'. I don't know much about these bites, but I don't think it's supposed to be this bad this-

[His voice is cut off by the sound of loud wet coughing that goes on for far longer than is healthy. When the coughing finally stops, there's a short silence, and when he speaks again his voice is weak]

It's only been three days...I hate t' ask again, but I need help. Does anyone...can anyone take care of this?

[There's a good deal of background noise here - if you listen, you can recognize claws on glass and the screeching of crabs]

Looks like I missed all the warnings 'bout bigger crabs.

Long story short, I'm cornered - internet cafe at 36th and Fifth. Not too far from Bryant Park Hotel, but far enough with these things outside the door.

[A short sigh - he doesn't like admitting this] I can't get out on my own - need some help. Anyone who's good at takin' these things down, if you'd lend a helping hand I'd much appreciate it.

[Screened to Chieftan, Spin, Starr, and Missy]

[His tone is still serious but also just got vehement] Don't any of you come. Fightin' ain't our strong suit, and I don't want anyone gettin' hurt - not at all and definitely not by these things.

I'll get out of it. I always do. But I don't want any of you gettin' into it.

[/Screen]

[NEW EDIT: Screened to Chieftan]

Chief, do me a favor and keep Starr from comin'? Do what you gotta do - sit on her or something, I dunno- just...don't let her get hurt. She's gonna come tryin' to find me if you don't.

[/Screen]

[So J gets bitten this week. Does anyone want to do a rescue log, or should we just have it happen offscreen?]

So, Rookie, how was it?

...come to think of it, who was it?

[Because Kia fails at timing, the date will probably not be threaded - just a journals-only thing. Ask if you need more details, and have fun~]

Anyone remember that post a while ago? 'Bout the real good friend of mine and the girl that ain't quite his yet? Well, I figure it's about time to get that party started.

Chief, y'already know what your part is. I'm headin' out to get supplies in a bit if you wanna come with.

Giselle, Piano Man, if you still want in I'd be more'n happy to have you.

And if anyone else wants to help make 'em a match...well, the more the merrier.

[There's a glimmer of amusement in here, but this is mostly an Oh Teh Overly Dramatic Dramaz post. He's having fun, though]

Seems like someone 'round here's got an off-kilter sense of humor. Folks, sorry to say, I woke up this mornin' with the world on my mind and ringin' in my ears. Turns out I'd been pranked.

Not only did the person responsible get me in the still of the night - oh no. They had the audacity to use the Bells on a String that Miss Maya so generously gave to the residents of this fair city. Miss Maya, I'm so sorry your wonderful invention was used for such a terrible purpose. Is there any way I can make it up to you?

And you original pranksters better shape up - I got my eye on you.

[Thus ends the most acting J has done in quite a while. If you listen close, you can hear him smiling the whole time. Applause~]

[Screened to Starr]

Starr, give 'em back.

[/Screened]

[As revenge for J's pranks on them, Spin, Missy, and Chieftan have tied bells in his hair while he was sleeping. Starr, on the other hand, nabbed his glasses and replaced them with a pair with bells glued on them. He's taking it with a laugh, seeing as he deserved it and all.]

[Have a voice post and oh, is he ever amused]

Took me a while, but it's totally worth it.

[Snicker] They're probably gonna kill me for this. Guess if these're my last words, they should be good ones. Hmm...

Worth it.

[Remember the Bells on a String? J got a metric ton of those and, overnight, nabbed articles of clothing from his fellow Agents. Missy and Starr's uniform tops now sport bells hanging from the fringe, Spin's headphones have strings of bells like earrings hanging from them, and the brim of Chieftan's hat is hung with bells all around. Sarah, Lisa, if you don't want in on this, lemme know and I'll take Spin and Missy off. Otherwise, talk to Guin about plans for revenge.]

[You can tell this definitely threw him off balance - he's certainly terse - but he's also determined not to let it drag him down. 3-2-1]

Jivers, report. This is Kilroy, settin' the beat.

...it got us in the dark of the matinee, but it ain't seen nothin' yet. For now, 6th and Greenwich is where the party's at, and but it's closing time. See you there.

And Jivers...walk the line.

Hey, Piano Man. I promised you songs and stories and I've got a few of each. When d'you wanna meet?

Ladies and gentlemen may I have your attention please.

Here's the deal: I've got a friend who's just crazy for this girl. Problem is, it hasn't gotten from her head to her heart (not even sure if it's in her head yet, actually) and he's not leavin' room for one more mistake.

I'm gonna set 'em up. Blind date, whole "secret admirer" deal...second verse, same as the first. You know the tune.

Thing is, I can't do it myself. Subtle is not exactly my middle name, and if my buddy finds out I'm behind anything he'll be on me like Joe Cocker on a mike stand. Believe me, that isn't pretty.

So I'm gettin' by with a little help from my friends. Who's in?

Gotta say, I love it when people work together like that. I hear everyone's back safe and sound. Awesome job, all.

[Screened to Spin and Missy//Hard]

Mission complete.

Missy, I'm impressed. I thought Prince Charming was supposed to go save his princess, not the other way around.

[/Screened]

I'm connectin' all the dots, but I'm still not seein' the bunny rabbit. What just happened?

Heck of a setup you've got here...I didn't know the Monster Mash was a two-step.

In any case, I'm new to this city, and it looks like I might be hangin' 'round downtown (hopefully not by myself) for a while. Buddy of mine tells me there's some pretty cool people around here, so. I guess that makes this a shout out to the cool people.

You can call me J.